Friday, 9 December 2011
My Teacher Sees Right Through Me
I didn’t do my homework.
My teacher asked me, “Why?”
I answered him, “It’s much too hard.”
He said, “You didn’t try.”
I told him, “My dog ate it.”
He said, “You have no dog.”
I said, “I went out running.”
He said, “You never jog.”
I told him, “I had chores to do.”
He said, “You watched TV.”
I said, “I saw the doctor.”
He said, “You were with me.”
My teacher sees right through my fibs,
which makes me very sad.
It’s hard to fool the teacher
when the teacher is your dad.
Text © Bruce Lansky, reprinted from My Teacher’s in Detention, forthcoming from Meadowbrook Press. Illustration © Stephen Carpenter.
I’m Staying Home from School Today
I’m staying home from school today.
I’d rather be in bed,
pretending that I have a pain
that’s pounding in my head.
I’ll say I have a stomachache.pretending that I have a pain
that’s pounding in my head.
I’ll claim I’ve got the flu.
I’ll shiver like I’m cold
and hold my breath until I’m blue.
I’ll fake a cough. I’ll fake a sneeze.
I’ll say my throat is sore.
If necessary, I can throw
a tantrum on the floor.
I’m sure I’ll get away with it.
Of that, there’s little doubt.
But even so, I really hope
my students don’t find out.
Text © Kenn Nesbitt, reprinted from Revenge of the Lunch Ladies published by Meadowbrook Press. Illustration © Mike & Carl Gordon
Mary Had a Little Dog
Mary had a little dog.
Its fur was black as night.
And everyone that Mary met
The dog was sure to bite.
It followed her to school one day,And everyone that Mary met
The dog was sure to bite.
Which was against the rule.
The dog bit Mary’s teacher’s leg,
So they threw her out of school.
Text © Bruce Lansky, reprinted from Peter, Peter, Pizza-Eater, published by Meadowbrook Press. Illustration © Stephen Carpenter.
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